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Something about my research project makes me very, very nervous. My paper is nearing 12k words, and all I have left to do is write the conclusion and finish my citations, but I get so preoccupied with a Need for Eloquence and Originality that my heart goes rabbiting in my chest when I think about opening the goddamn google doc. Have I written too much? Does my argument even make sense? Am I shifting too fast between technical descriptions of nuclear reactors and the geopolitics of 1960s Europe?
Today one of my friends saw me working on the paper frantically during a free block and started pulling my leg and calling me a massive nerd. Afterward I texted her something like "don't go on telling everyone about my nuclear power paper! I get shy when talking about my research interests the way other people get shy when talking about their crushes."
"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON NUCLEAR POWER!?" she said.
"It's an analogy." I clarified, before attaching a diagram of a SMR with the caption "let me introduce you to my beautiful wife."
"Wait that lowkey looks cool. Your wife is pretty hot."
"SHE'S NOT INTERESTED!!!!! She only wants MY graphite rod in her core."
I'm not sure why I'm writing all this down. Maybe to remind myself to stop fretting uselessly and get on with the damn thing already.
Today one of my friends saw me working on the paper frantically during a free block and started pulling my leg and calling me a massive nerd. Afterward I texted her something like "don't go on telling everyone about my nuclear power paper! I get shy when talking about my research interests the way other people get shy when talking about their crushes."
"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON NUCLEAR POWER!?" she said.
"It's an analogy." I clarified, before attaching a diagram of a SMR with the caption "let me introduce you to my beautiful wife."
"Wait that lowkey looks cool. Your wife is pretty hot."
"SHE'S NOT INTERESTED!!!!! She only wants MY graphite rod in her core."
I'm not sure why I'm writing all this down. Maybe to remind myself to stop fretting uselessly and get on with the damn thing already.
